How ‘The Help’ Helped Me

My FAVE affirmation deck; Love Powered Co ‘Femme’

I often get asked *how* I got through the pits of recovery and out the other side. How I mustered the strength to keep going, even on the really hard days.

The truth is- I really don’t know.

I just did it.

I told myself I would get better, I told myself I would walk, and live a beautiful life… so I did.

It wasn’t until YEARS later that I realized I was using affirmations as a tool to succeed.

When I was in first year university, so lets say around 2012, the book The Help was being turned into a movie. It’s an incredibly important story if you haven’t read/seen it, and if you have you maybe remember Aibileen teaching the young girl “You is kind, you is strong, you is important”.

After reading the book, whenever I felt stuck or overwhelmed at school, I would say that to myself for comfort.

I know I could have chosen my own words, but I really didn’t know what those words would even be. All I knew was that little mantra from the book series reminded me that I WAS kind, I WAS strong, and I WAS important.

After my accident I was told many times to be prepared for a very different sort of life. Nobody could tell me what the end result of my recovery would look like, because nobody had survived this kind of fall the way I had. I was ADAMANT that I would be up dancing in no time. That I would be living without pain, and without being on government assistance because of brain trauma.

I would watch videos of professional athletes making incredible come backs after insane injuries, and I convinced myself that if they could do it then I could as well.

I would constantly talk to my body saying “I am safe”

I would remind myself “I am loved”

When I felt pain in my body I would talk to those parts as if they were a small child. Letting them know its okay that we’re hurting, but that it won’t last forever.

I wrote down all the things I knew my future had in store for me- not just surgeries and pain medication. But love, and happiness, and community.

I had no room for anything that wasn’t going to help bring me forward. Because when I did let the intensity of my reality set in, it sometimes felt hopeless.

I was using affirmations before I even knew what they were, and they helped me literally make it through the darkest parts of my journey.

Now I use them ALL the time.

My current favourite is reminding myself that

“yes I can”

Whenever I feel like I’m about to embark on something extremely challenging, or I’m falling into imposter syndrome, I remember YES. I can do ANYTHING I want.

I fell 20ft onto concrete steps, and survived and have a fully gorgeous life, for crying out loud.

Side note; one of my best friends likes to remind me I am

“Dominique, fell of a f*cking balcony Cheshire”

Which I feel like is a very special affirmation in and of itself 😂

If you’ve never tried an affirmation before, here’s what I recommend.

If your best friend, or small child came to you, what would you want to say to boost them up?

“You are amazing”

“You are beautiful”

“You are talented, smart, kind, funny, capable, strong, brilliant”

Say those things to yourself. Everyday.

And if anything tries to creep in to tell you otherwise, say “no thank you”

Because you deserve all of those good thoughts, you ARE all of those beautiful things.

Yes I can, and so can you!

D xo

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